Forge Through Thoughts

Thoughts do not forge reality until action comes into play. From time to time, thoughts arise that don't quite represent who I am, as they can be vile sometimes. Not intentionally, but they're there to be reckoned.

I found myself wanting to change my environment one day so I went to a local coffee shop. The environment is rather small and is barely able to gasp for any natural light as it is facing in the opposite direction of the sun. I ordered my coffee and managed to find an empty seat on this long bench that was shared among 3 separate tables.

It takes me a few minutes to get into the zone and begin writing, afterward, everything begins to zone out, and I'm practically non-existent. There had to be some kind of grand disturbance for me to get me out of my flow, that's when I began to feel some kind of vibration from the bench as it was shared among 3 separate tables.

I felt the bench shaking, and in the corner of my eye I could see a person eating a burrito, and it felt rather aggressive and stressful. I began to feel uncomfortable and somewhat stressed. My Initial thought was, "Why is he eating so aggressively?" It bothered me a little since it was so unnatural to my experience of eating as I tend to take my time. I tried to refocus on writing, but all my attention kept going back to the guy eating. So I tried to process what was happening while watching him from my peripherals, I began to feel more bothersome, stressed, and irritated.

After 8 minutes, he took his final bite, the last sip of his coffee, and a sense of relief sighed. He took a moment to look around and rushed off. Usually, moments like these don't bother me, besides chewing loudly with their mouth open which drives me up the walls. But, this was an odd observation to be drawn upon.

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The Thought

When I got back home, I realized the thought I had about the guy could have been impacted by multiple aspects such as, feeling his emotions, personal triggers like chewing loudly or just being interrupted from my writing. To pinpoint the exact reason isnt really important neither are the thoughts from that moment. What's important is what was done with those thoughts.

If I had gone up to the guy and commented on his eating, that would have solidified the thought. Luckily, that was not the case and it just remained as a cloud. Similarly, only when a cloud releases it's content will it make the ground wet. Otherwise, a cloud will just be a cloud. A thought will just rise up like a cloud and float in the sky until it passes by.

The Action

When enough clouds or precipitation are formed, then it will release its content upon the ground. In other words, a single thought (cloud) could arise, and when it's fixated on long enough (accumulation) it will then release it's content (action).

When I got the thought that was the initial cloud, if I were to fixate on it longer, I would have accumulated more clouds (thoughts) and began forming reasoning, ideas, why, what, who, when, where and all these speculations. I begin to stir the content in the clouds so much that at some point, im bound to burst (action).

Luckily, that was not the case, and essentially it was just a thought. Still wish the man the best, and hope he had a great day.

The Reflection

Thoughts come and go, it is only when it's acted upon that it will bring it to life. Just like a cloud, it is innocent until it is accumulated enough to bring the reign over the land.

I blamed my self for having those thoughts about a person i've never met, nor know anything about. I felt vile for having those thoughts, but then I thought about it. Those thoughts wasn't mine to begin with. It's not like I sat there and actively formulated those thoughts, it came up from nowhere and I just felt those thoughts. If I were to sit there and formulate sinister thoughts about this guy, that would be a different story.

So in the end, thoughts that comes and go, it is only when it's acted upon that it will solidify those thoughts.
The thoughts does not define me, my action does. That's when I understood, I blamed my self for no reason, why do I have to blame my self for something that I didnt actively do? If I were to sit there actively and formulate those thoughts about him, then yeah I take the blame. But, that wasnt the case, and no harm was done, so im off the case.

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The thoughts do not define one, action does.

Explore this topic further on this podcast, enjoy!